Stephen Hines

Author of Hocus Focus, Valedictorian USA, and Crackerstacker

*Cerebral Spewings

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Summer Rockin' '09

Posted on August 14, 2009 at 5:39 PM Comments comments (1)

My wife Missy and I just got back from the second real concert we?vegone to this summer. Before tonight, we saw an outdoor concert of avery talented, veteran classic rock cover band who, thanks theuber-conservative town where we live, had to play so quietly theaudience could hear themselves fart over the music. I?d name check theband here but I?m drawing a blank.




Afterthat show we saw a Motley Crue tribute band called Starry Eyes. No, I?mnot one of...

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"Spring" (a poem from a teacher's point of view)

Posted on April 23, 2009 at 6:34 PM Comments comments (2)

Okay, I'm too bogged down to do a proper blog, but here's a poem I wrote yesterday for my students' poetry unit test. They had to analyze one poem they'd studied in class and another (this one) that they'd never seen before.


It’s spring outside and I’m trapped in here

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Dr. Manhattan's Swinging Blue Member: My Review of The Watchmen

Posted on March 7, 2009 at 11:26 PM Comments comments (4)


     I just got home from seeing The Watchmen and I’m still reeling. But, oddly enough, the reeling is twofold: from the cinematic genius of the movie and, unexpectedly, the violently negative reaction from a large percentage of the exiting audience members.
    Granted, the latter could largely be the re...

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Johnny (Rotten) Come (On Feel the Noize) Lately: Part 3

Posted on December 28, 2008 at 5:43 PM Comments comments (2)


     Last time I finished up by singing the praises of the mighty Wildhearts (who just posted a new, free track on MySpace ...

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Johnny (Rotten) Come (On Feel the Noise) Lately: Part 2

Posted on December 4, 2008 at 6:07 PM Comments comments (3)
Okay, in part one I neglected to mention that I listened to a lot of Anthrax in high school as well. It took a while for their music to totally click with me, but, once I saw the video for "Indians" I was hooked.

      At the time, I had no idea that Anthrax was mixing west coast speed metal with NYC hardcore punk. I ...
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Johnny (Rotten) Come (On Feel the Noise) Lately: Part 1

Posted on November 14, 2008 at 9:07 PM Comments comments (1)
Yesterday I was out walking, trying to exercise some flab away. My MP3 player was blasting in my earholes and I remembered that I'd been planning to blog about my long and winding path to punk rock fandom. Most of my friends down here in southwestern Ohio know me as a punker, but they only know the most recent installment of my musical saga.  
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Our New President Elect (Or Things That Crack Me Up About Conservatives)

Posted on November 6, 2008 at 5:41 PM Comments comments (8)

     So we have a new president named Barack Obama.

     In my last blog I mentioned that I was, somewhat reluctantly, voting for the man. And I did. To be honest, I waffled quite a bit after posting that blog. After rereading it, along with Terry Ervin's comments, I realized that I was being a hypocrit.

     How, you ask?

     Well, I criticized people who let Bush manipulate them (with f...

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The Upcoming Election

Posted on October 10, 2008 at 8:30 PM Comments comments (0)
While I believe that all politicians are untrustworthy scumbags, I think the real problem isn't McCain, Palin, Obama or Biden. Any time there's a monopoly, the majority (consumers/voters) loses. As long as we only have two so-called choices, our country's doomed to continue it's downward slide. We need more choices. The more the better. If we had 3-5 choices, it would force the lying scumbags to be at least somewhat more honest.

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The Satanic Bible, Psychic Vampires, Un-Solicited Advice, and the Silent Treatment

Posted on August 17, 2008 at 6:13 PM Comments comments (6)
     This summer I felt like reading something anti-establishment, so I picked up a copy of Anton LaVey's Satanic Bible. I'll admit that I only read the first 105-110 pages (after page 100 it turned into a treatise on spell casting, something that modern, rational human beings shouldn't pursue, in my humble opinion) but I found myself agreeing with most of what Mr. LaVey said.
     Before you picture me sitting ...
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The New Lady in my Life

Posted on August 15, 2008 at 1:00 PM Comments comments (0)

Hey Howdy!

So I blogged a while back about my P.O.S. Neon's transmission possibly being on the fritz. Well, there's no probably about it anymore. The specialist said she'd need at least $1000 worth of overh...
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